The Strawberry Blonde

Amy Lind:
You're not a very easy person to get to know, Mr. Grimes.

Biff Grimes:
Well, that's the kind of a hairpin I am.

Biff Grimes:
I uh, I guess a little kiss is harmless if it's all in fun.

Amy Lind:
Even if it isn't in fun.

Biff Grimes:
You mean - -?

Amy Lind:
Exactly.

Biff Grimes:
Well, wouldn't you like a nice, young man to marry you someday?

Amy Lind:
No, not particularly.

Biff Grimes:
So you don't believe in the institution of marriage!

Amy Lind:
An outmoded, silly convention started by the cavemen and encouraged by the florists and jewelers. After all, what's marriage?

Biff Grimes:
Wouldn't you like to have a home and kids?

Amy Lind:
Certainly I would, but that doesn't mean you have to go through all the...

Biff Grimes:
You mean - -?

Amy Lind:
Exactly.

[she winks]

Biff Grimes:
I'm gonna have a smoke.

Amy Lind:
May I have one too, please?

Biff Grimes:
Oh, sure. Hey! Don't tell me you smoke!

Amy Lind:
Only when I'm bored.

Biff Grimes:
Well, your mother's a bloomer girl, you're a nicotine fiend, are there any more at home like you?

Amy Lind:
I have an aunt who's an actress.

Biff Grimes:
Well, that completes the picture. I've been around, they can say an awful lot of things about Biff Grimes, but not that he ever gave a cigarette to a girl.

Amy Lind:
There's something about the country air.

Biff Grimes:
Hm?

Amy Lind:
I said, there's something about the country air.

Biff Grimes:
I like city air.

Amy Lind:
Well... there really isn't any difference between city air and country air. They're both hydrogen, and oxygen, and -...

Biff Grimes:
Air! You can't even see it, so why talk about it?

Virginia Brush:
I don't want him to think I am staring at him. You look at him and tell me what you think of him.

Amy Lind:
Well, the only one I can see clearly from here is the horse, [hesitates] and I'm disappointed in him.

Amy Lind:
[as Hugo and Biff speed by]

Amy Lind:
Here they come.

Virginia Brush:
[excitedly] They're just trying to make an impression.

Amy Lind:
[bewildered] Do you think we'll ever see them again?

Virginia Brush:
[excited whisper] The street runs in a circle; they should be back any minute.

Amy Lind:
Oh for goodness sake, Virginia, cut out the nonsense. This is a pre-arranged date and we all know it. I've got to get back on duty by 11, so come on, let's shake our tootsies.

Virginia Brush:
Amy!

Amy Lind:
Oh 'Amy!' my Grandmother's hot water bottle!

Biff Grimes:
[muttering to Hugo] She's fast.

Hugo F. Barnstead:
[under breath] Yeah.

Amy Lind:
[Virginia is disappointed that Amy didn't change]

Amy Lind:
I'm proud of my uniform. It's a sign to the men that women not only have the same right to work as the men, but that in the eyes...

Virginia Brush:
Ooh hush, Amy. You're not at a suffragette meeting now!

Amy Lind:
[continuing her tirade] The tyranny for man or for woman. The stupid convention that says a woman will wear such and such. The...

Virginia Brush:
Please, Amy, just tonight, try to be a woman not a pamphlet.

Amy Lind:
[she stands up, looking at the sky] Women throughout the ages... oh, it's a lovely night.

Man:
[to everyone in the barber shop] Hey fellas! Here comes the strawberry blonde!

Amy Lind:
[Amy winks at a man in the park]

Virginia Brush:
Amy!

Amy Lind:
Yes, dear.

Virginia Brush:
If there's something in your eye, Amy, I'll help you get it out.

Amy Lind:
Oh, bosh. There's nothing in my eye, I just plain and simple winked at him that's all.

Virginia Brush:
No, Amy. Either he's an old friend of the family's or there's something in your eye.

Amy Lind:
I never saw him before in my life until a few minutes ago when I passed Fisher's drug store.

Virginia Brush:
[excited] Oh, Amy. He followed you here?

Amy Lind:
No. I followed him.

Virginia Brush:
Oh, Amy.

Virginia Brush:
[Biff and Hugo arrive in the park]

Virginia Brush:
Now listen. We won't say a word to them. Just let them pass. Of course if they say something, we'll say something.

Amy Lind:
And if they don't say anything, we won't say anything.

Virginia Brush:
No. Just drop your eyes.

Amy Lind:
Drop my eyes?

Virginia Brush:
Yes. That'll show them we're good girls and they can't trifle with us.

Amy Lind:
Well, for goodness sakes, what did we come here for if not to be trifled with.

Virginia Brush:
[they are at the Statue of Liberty and they watch a woman slap a man for trying to kiss her]

Virginia Brush:
And she was right too.

Biff Grimes:
Well, if a man can't get liberties here, where can he?

Amy Lind:
[Amy accuses her of asking Hugo out without being properly introduced]

Virginia Brush:
Why I never did any such thing! I simply happened to mention that I was in habit of taking walks in the park with my girlfriend. And besides in moral I didn't wink.

Amy Lind:
Don't be a hypocrite, Virginia. Spiritually, you winked.

[last lines]

Biff Grimes:
[repeated line] That's the kind of hairpin I am!

Virginia Brush:
Honey, why can't you be nice to me once in a while?

Hugo F. Barnstead:
Oh, I've been thinkin' about it. Then I remember we're married, so why bother?

Nicholas Pappalas:
[Reminiscing] Oh, she was a beautiful girl, Virginia!

Biff Grimes:
Now what made you bring up Virginia?

Nicholas Pappalas:
Virginia? You were stuck on her, ain't you?

Biff Grimes:
[Looking around for Amy] Me? No...

Nicholas Pappalas:
Well, I was.

Biff Grimes:
Oh, I liked her in a nice way.

Nicholas Pappalas:
Yeah, I liked her too but I forget which way.

Amy Lind:
[Amazed at the chandelier] I just can't gt over that electric light. Isn't it dangerous?

Hugo F. Barnstead:
[Amusing himself] Oh, not if you pay the bills.

Hugo F. Barnstead:
[In terrible pain after getting an abscessed tooth pulled] Oh, uh, uh, uh! What's the idea? I wanted gas!

Hugo F. Barnstead:
I haven't got anything against you any more, Hugo, but I wouldn't be quite human if I didn't take a little revenge.

Nicholas Pappalas:
[Listening to somg from German ooomph-band leader] Boy, how those moiders the English language!

Nicholas Pappalas:
[while playing horseshoes] Beef, what is it the score?

Biff Grimes:
I don't know. Haven't you been keeping track?

Nicholas Pappalas:
Since when do I suppose to knowhow to count?

Biff Grimes:
You can count in Greek, can't you?

Nicholas Pappalas:
But this ain't no Greek game.

Biff Grimes:
Are we playing for money?

Nicholas Pappalas:
Sure.

Biff Grimes:
in that case, I'm way ahead.

Nicholas Pappalas:
I think tomorrow mornin' I start to go to night school.

Nicholas Pappalas:
[Referring to Virginia] For her I take out citizenship papers.

Barber Shop Hanger-on:
[Seeing Nick put a leech on Biff's eye] Wonderful invention, the leech!

Nicholas Pappalas:
That's not an invention - it's an animal.

Biff Grimes:
Gosh, you look wonderful!

Virginia Brush:
Oh, Biff, but you...? Is that another black eye or the same one?

Biff Grimes:
[Dismissively to Amy] I wish you'd tie a can to yourself and beat it?