The Toxic Avenger

Cigar Face:
[while counting money] When we lay this wad on O'Clancy, the boss is going to have him by the balls.

Nipples:
I don't think O'Clancy will take the money. Everyone says he's a honest cop.

Knuckles:
He don't take the dough, I'm going to give him a blow.

Bruce:
I heard that the monster is soooo big.

Chauncey:
Well I bet he's got his eye on ME!

Bruce:
For your information, everyone knows monsters prefer blondes.

[Julie and Wanda are looking at pictures of a dead kid]

Julie:
That new camera really captures the moments.

Wanda:
I know. The reds are so red. It really gets me hot.

Frank:
Good afternoon ladies and gentlemen, we are the entertainment for this afternoon. Now on the shotgun we've got my man Leroy. And on the cash register, we've got that magic fingers Rico.

Rico:
That's me.

Frank:
And last but not least, yours truely, Frank, on the stick.

Wanda:
Slug, are you sure no one will come in?

Slug:
I paid Tony 15 bucks. He said the place is ours till tomorrow morning.

Slug:
[to The Toxic Avenger] Get out of here you pervert.

[Wanda pulls out a switchblade]

Wanda:
Or I'll kill you.

Officer O'Clancy:
Forget it, you're wasting your time.

Cigar Face:
That's where you're wrong. You're wasting our time. And now we're gonna waste you!

The Toxic Avenger:
[as he kills Mrs. Haskell] Hohohoho. No ticky, no washy!

The Toxic Avenger:
[to the Mayor] You fat slob. Let's see if you've got any guts. [he punches the mayor in the stomach and rips out his guts] Officer O'Clancy, take care of this toxic waste.

Cigar Face:
Honest cops are all alike. A bunch of f***ing faggots.

Cigar Face:
I owe you for the other night monster f*ggot. So now we're going to give you six new a**holes. Compliments of me Cigar Face.

Leroy:
All right everybody, drop your tacos or I'll blow your brains out.

Leroy:
Hey look Frank. Teeny-boppers. You like video games teeny-boppers? Your mommy give you quarters for video games? Well cough 'em up.

Leroy:
Look what we've got here. A little mother and a littler baby. You like Mexican food little baby? [points his gun at the baby] Well how would you like to have this hot tamale shoved down your throat?

Frank:
Now if you all do just what we tell you you just might, just might get your asses home all intact.

Sara:
Why Melvin you're beautiful. You're a beautiful person. You're so muscular. It's been two years since I've touched a man.