Front Page News2002

[to Amber, her bound and gagged captive]

Darla:
Remember that time you went under cover to get the story on prostitution and you got caught? They were going to use that super-high voltage sex toy on you, but I came in with the cops at the last minute and saved your bacon! That would have been really nasty. And then there was the time you were going to do that report on the local dungeon scene - they saw through you in a minute. I *think* they were just going try to scare the living daylights out of you, but I'm not completely sure about that. I mean, they did have an alligator pit, but anyway, so you were lucky I was there to stop them. You just gotta know how to talk to these people. Not that I have any experience with that kinky sort of stuff, mind you. But my favorite was the time we caught by those urban cannibals - you helped me escape and then they were getting ready to have you for dinner! I'll bet you didn't think I was coming back for you, did you?