Les Misérables2012

Madame Th?nardier:
[to male customer] I used to dream that I would meet a prince, but God Almighty, have you seen what's happened since?

Th?nardier:
[defensive as others stare at him] What? What?

Madame Th?nardier:
Master of the house isn't worth my spit. Comforter, philosopher, and life-long sh*t. Cunning little brain; regular Voltaire. Thinks he's quite a lover, but there's not much there.

[All stare at his crotch]

Madame Th?nardier:
[pretending to cry] What a cruel trick of nature landed me with such a louse.

[She takes the man's purse while he's distracted]

Madame Th?nardier:
[suddenly cheering up] God knows how I've lasted living with this bastard in the house!