Robin Williams: Weapons of Self Destruction2009

Robin Williams:
The definition of pornography is quite simple. Erotic is using a feather, pornography is using the entire chicken.

[laughter]

Robin Williams:
Which is weird. And I've been watching a little bit of porn since I've been on the road.

[raises his hand and "speaks" through it, a la a ventriloquist dummy]

Robin Williams:
"A little?"

Robin Williams:
[pushes his hand down]

Robin Williams:
Shut up.

[laughter]

Robin Williams:
And with porn movies, they don't have "Cumming Attractions," 'cause if it was, you'd be like "Oh, done! Thank you, fine."

[laughter]

Robin Williams:
With porn movies, when you're watching them, it's basically they're an hour and a half long. And who watches an entire f***ing porn movie?

[off audience reaction]

Robin Williams:
One guy up there going "I do!"