Strongbad_email.exe: Disc Five2007

Strong Bad:
Strong Badia: an idyllic fruit-opia rich in made-up stories and not-true-ities, the not-true-est of which...

[prods the tire in Strong Badia, causing a bear holding a shark to pop up; The Cheat runs past in terror]

The Cheat:
[screaming The Cheat noises]

Strong Bad:
...is the mighty bear holding a shark. More than a mere security countermeasure, its origins lie in the skies of old.

[cut to the night sky, where various constellations are formed, including one of a fish wearing an afro and a marathon runner wearing a Union Jack-themed singlet]

Strong Bad:
The stars tell us that two of the seven elemental spirits of Strong Badia, the fish wearing a 'fro wig and the British distance runner, combined forces to defeat the others. In paintball... or maybe Red Rover. Then, through years of bad storytelling and the telephone game, the mythic beast transformed into the bear holding a shark we know today.

[shows off some fence drawings of the bear holding a shark terrorizing the countryside]

Strong Bad:
These ancient fence drawings show evidence of destroyed crops, stolen babies, and family bike-rides. Or family pie-sitting contests. Bear-holding-a-shark fever gripped the nation.

[Bubs is seen selling some bear-holding-a-shark-themed merchandise from his concession stand]

Bubs:
[holding up an ice cream bar] We got bear-holding-a-shark frozen delights...

[shows off a pile of glasses next to him]

Bubs:
...and these shot glasses are always popular with the kids. Oh, and my favorite...

[reaches down and produces a necklace]

Bubs:
...these bear-tooth-holding-a-shark-tooth necklaces!