The Odd Couple1968

Murray:
What are you, crazy, letting him go to the john alone?

Roy:
Suppose he tries to kill himself!

Oscar Madison:
How's he gonna kill himself in the john?

Murray:
Whaddaya mean, how? Razor blades, poison, anything that's in there.

Oscar Madison:
Nah, that's the kids' bathroom. The worst he could do in there is brush his teeth to death.

Roy:
He could jump!

Vinnie:
That's right! Isn't there a window in there?

Oscar Madison:
Yeah, but it's only six inches wide.

Murray:
Yeah, well he could break the glass - he could cut his wrists!

Oscar Madison:
He could also flush himself into the East River. I'm telling you he's not going to try anything.

Roy:
Sh! Sh! Listen, listen! [they all follow Roy to the bathroom door; Felix is heard crying] He's crying. You hear that, he's crying!

Murray:
Isn't that terrible? For God's sakes, Oscar, do something, say something!

Oscar Madison:
What? What do you say to a man who's crying in your bathroom?