The Taking of Pelham 1 2 32009

Walter Garber:
What's her name?

Ryder:
Lavitca, she was Lithuanian... she was an ASS-model.

Walter Garber:
She asked you what?

Ryder:
You heard of hand-models, right? Advertisements?

Walter Garber:
Right.

Ryder:
She was an ass-model... she did jeans and uh you know, magazines and sh*t. Anyway, it was fashion week in New York and uh... I took her to Iceland.

Walter Garber:
Lavitca, Lithuanian, Ass model, Iceland, you took her to the ice...

Ryder:
So, for five-hundred bucks they'll take you on a dog-sled ride on a glacier.

Walter Garber:
Dog-sled?

Ryder:
Yeah... and you know that whole saying that if you're not the lead dog, the view never changes?

Walter Garber:
Right, otherwise you're always looking at the a**hole of the dog in front of you.

Ryder:
That'll be funny in a minute when I get to that part.

Walter Garber:
It's funny now.

Ryder:
[next scene] And it's eight in the morning, we haven't been to bed yet... and we're tooling across this glacier and I got this hangover that's creeping up the back of my neck... and guess what I'm looking at?

Walter Garber:
You're obviously you're staring at... the ass of the dog in front of you.

Ryder:
You got it! So this dog... out of nowhere just lifts his hind-legs up and puts them in the, you know the harness there... and just takes a sh*t, while he's running on his front paws. So he's dumping and running, all at the same time... now that's multi-f***ing-tasking if you ask me.

Walter Garber:
Get outta here, did it hit you?

Ryder:
Sh*t always hits you man. [next scene] I didn't know it at the time, but it was profound.

Walter Garber:
Profound?

Ryder:
Yeah.

Walter Garber:
Why? Uh, you lost me.

Ryder:
Well, you know uh... when I went to prison later on, what you called. Uh, I had trouble going to the toilet... you know, a privacy thing. And I... couldn't take a sh*t. I was scared shitless... literally. So, you know what I thought of?

Walter Garber:
You thought of the dog.

Ryder:
That's right... I thought of that dog. If it could do what it needed to do... so could I. It saved my f***ing live.

Walter Garber:
Wow, that is profound.