When Louis Met... Keith Harris & Orville in Panto2002

[Keith is complaining about a newspaper article that has offended him]

Louis Theroux:
[reading] "While Keith Harris, blissfully unaware of age requirements, plays the youthful Buttons." What is the problem there? You said the guy said that you were too old for panto, he's just saying you're a bit old to play Buttons.

Keith Harris:
I won't buy The Big Issue again, because that's where it's from. Don't bite the hand that feeds you, son!

Louis Theroux:
It's not all - it goes "Where's your career?" Did you read this?

Keith Harris:
Yeah.

Louis Theroux:
"It's behind you!"

Keith Harris:
People have always knocked what I do. Because they can't see - they haven't got the brains, obviously, to see or analyse what I really do do and why am I still there doing it, and why it's so successful. They go "Oh, it's the fella with the green thing, pathetic thing, oh yeah, crap."

[cut to a few minutes later]

Louis Theroux:
Am I winding you up?

Keith Harris:
I don't think you understand, you don't understand me, that's the thing.

Louis Theroux:
I do.

Keith Harris:
I don't think you do.

Louis Theroux:
I do.

Keith Harris:
You can't see, you know... I think I've lived with it for so many years and it's really screwed me up inside... You know, it's hurtful.

Louis Theroux:
What?

Keith Harris:
What people say. And you say you shouldn't give a damn what people say...

Louis Theroux:
What do they say?

Keith Harris:
Well, forever saying, you know, this pathetic... I had a lovely thing in the paper once, "This pathetic man came out with his permed hair looking like - with his hair like pubic hair stuck on his head" And just slating you, you know, that hurts. [pointing at Orville] It's all his fault. That thing there, that I created. Crikey, just think, so much has gone on about that little green thing.