A Christmas Story1983

Flick:
You're full of beans, and so is your old man.

Schwartz:
Oh, yeah?

Flick:
Yeah!

Schwartz:
Says who?

Flick:
Says me!

Schwartz:
Oh, yeah?

Flick:
Yeah!

Schwartz:
Well, I double-dare ya!

Ralphie as an Adult:
[narrating] The exact exchange and nuance of phrase in this ritual is very important.

Flick:
Huh! Are you kidding? Stick my tongue to that stupid pole? That's dumb.

Schwartz:
That's 'cause you know it'll stick!

Flick:
You're full of it!

Schwartz:
OH, YEAH?

Flick:
Yeah!

Schwartz:
Well, I double dog-dare ya!

Ralphie as an Adult:
[narrating] Now it was serious. A double dog-dare. What else was left but a "triple-dare you"? And finally, the coup de grace of all dares, the sinister triple dog-dare.

Flick:
[over narrator's voice] This guy's really dumb.

Schwartz:
I TRIPLE dog-dare ya!

Ralphie as an Adult:
[narrating] Heh. Schwartz created a slight breach of etiquette by skipping the triple-dare and going right for the throat!

Flick:
All right, all right.

[Flick sighs and hesitantly sticks his tongue out]

Schwartz:
Oh, go on, smart-ass, and do it!

Flick:
[tongue out] I'm goin', I'm goin'!

Ralphie as an Adult:
[narrating] Flick's spine stiffened, his lips curled in a defiant sneer. There was no going back now.

Flick:
[puts his tongue on pole] This is nothin'. [tries to pull off, but can't and realizes Schwartz was right.] Stuck? Stuck?! STUCK!!! STUCK!!!!! [he starts screaming and crying like a baby]

Schwartz:
Jeez! It really works! Look at him! [The school bell rings] Ralphie! Where are they going?!

[The students run back to the school except Flick, who keeps crying with his tongue stuck on the pole]

Flick:
Don't Leave! Come back! Come back! Don't leave me, come back!

Ralphie:
But the bell rang!

Schwartz:
Well, what are we gonna do?!

Ralphie:
I don't know, the bell rang!

Flick:
Don't leave me, come back! Come back, come back! [he starts crying loudly as he is still stuck to the pole]