Martin and Lewis2002

[While Jerry is testing on an audition to play Al in My Friend Irma]

Hal Wallis:
Well were all friends here, so lets speak frankly. Jerry, your not an actor.

Jerry Lewis:
I can do better.

Director:
I worked with him as much as I could, Hal. We shot nine tests, he just doesn't have it.

Jerry Lewis:
Fellas, I'm here in the room with you.

Hal Wallis:
Jerry, don't take this personally.

Jerry Lewis:
How?

Director:
Jerry, this shows been on the radio for years, it has millions of fans. If someone whose not right plays Al, the audience will kill us.

Jerry Lewis:
What about Dean?

Hal Wallis:
Dean's great. He's very natural, he'll be perfect as Steve.

Director:
Here's what Hal was thinking, were gonna write a part just for you. We'll call him Seymour, a really whacky sidekick to Dean. You can be yourself and have fun, it'll be perfect.

Jerry Lewis:
[angrily] Listen to me, Mr Wallis. Jerry Lewis plays Al, like it says in my contract.

Hal Wallis:
You listen to me, Jerry Lewis. I don't give a damn what it says in you're contract, you're not right for Al, you're not playing Al. That's it, that's all.

Jerry Lewis:
I'm not playing Seymour. I'm playing Al, I can do it.

Hal Wallis:
You don't want to play Seymour, Jerry. I'll tell you what, you sit this picture up. We'll go for Dean to play Steve, we'll get a real actor to play Al, and you, well you can go back to New York.

Jerry Lewis:
You can't do that. Dean and I are partners, were a team. I don't like you, Hal Wallis.

Hal Wallis:
Ahh, now you went and hurt my feelings.