Wanted2008

Janice:
Jesus H f***ing Popsicle, I still don't have my billing reports, but you've got time to sit there and Google your ass off. Well I know one thing: [smugly] You've got your review coming up next week, and I can't wait to start checking me off some big [clicking stapler loudly] f***ing boxes! Attitude: [Click] Poor. Performance: [Click] Poor. Management skills: [Click] Poor. Works well with others? Hah! That's a f***ing joke. [Looks at Wesleys computer] What is this bullshit; who's this prick? Some loser gets his head blown off in the Metropolitan-

Wesley:
[Has reached boiling point, snaps] SHUT THE F*** UP!!! [gets up and walks a lap around the office] [To colleagues] She has ONE, SINGLE iota of tenuous power, she thinks she can just push everyone around! [Comes back to a shocked Janice, snatches stapler from her, holds it up] You don't need this. [Throws it against cubicle wall, smashing it] [Leans in close to Janice, whispers] I understand. [Stands to full height] Junior High must've been kinda tough, but it doesn't give you the right to treat your workers like horse sh*t, Janice. I know we laugh at you, Janice. We all know you keep your stash of jelly donuts in the top drawer of your desk. [Kneels down] I want you to know: that if you weren't such a b*tch, we'd feel sorry for you. I do feel sorry for you. But as it stands, the way you behave, I feel I can speak for the entire office when I tell you... Go f*** yourself. [Stands up, takes his keyboard walks out]

Barry:
Yeah, that was great bro, who's the man?

Wesley:
[smashes Barry in the face with the keyboard, bloodstained keys fly past spelling F*** YO, the final U being one of Barry's molars] I'm the man.