CSI: Crime Scene Investigation2000

Jonathan Danson:
My name is Jonathan Danson, and I'm here to set you free. Free from a vision of an antiseptic future filled with... with heroes and heroines who are always steadfast and well-adjusted and altruistic. Like most of you, I grew up with "Astro Quest." Every Thursday night my dad would gather the family around our TV to watch the latest episode. I loved it! But the older I got, the more the mythology began to eat away at my soul. I couldn't measure up to the brave crew of that perfect ship. I wasn't handsome, courageous and strong, I was weak, petty, self-destructive and I hated myself for it. But then, one night it hit me like a bolt of lightning. I looked around the bar at the other frightened, sad people and I said to myself "Do you see an Artemus Bishop here? Do you see one at work?" People, look around you! Do you see an Artemus Bishop anywhere? Of course not, because he's a fictional construct, a phantom who whispers "You are not enough!" Well, I am here to show you who we really are. Ladies and gentlemen, I give you "Astro Quest Redux!"