Gilmore Girls2000

Lane:
Lorelai!

Lorelai:
Hi Lane!

Lane:
You're in possession.

Lorelai:
Of what?

Lane:
Of the wedding dress.

Lorelai:
Oh, um yeah, it's safe and sound. I was just starting to dig into it.

Lane:
Don't dig! Slice, kick, maim, destroy!

Lorelai:
What?

Lane:
Stick a mad pack of wolves on it, douse it with lighter fluid and turn it into ash, I cannot wear that dress!

Lorelai:
Yeah I know. It's a little Old World.

Lane:
Have you looked at it?

Lorelai:
Parts of it.

Lane:
Exactly, you can't take it in all at once, the human eye is not capable.

Lorelai:
Oh, it's not that bad.

Lane:
Its got pants.

Lorelai:
[intakes breath] No!

Lane:
You didn't look at it very carefully.

Lorelai:
Well, I will remove the pants.

Lane:
Oh, it's every girl's dream to hear the woman altering her wedding dress say "I'll remove the pants."

Lorelai:
I'm sure once I alter it a little...

Lane:
No don't alter it, have an accident! Leave a warm iron on it, spill a vat of acid on it, run your car over it!

Lorelai:
Lane. Lane! I haven't even put it on the mannequin yet. Let me startwork on it and I will keep you fully posted every step of the way.

[Later Lorelai is looking at the awful thing, picks up the hoop skirt end and notices the tiny white pants with gold trim underneath, steps away for a second then steps back and spills the coffee she is holding all over it]