Hi Honey, I'm Home1991

Elaine Duff:
Honey?

Honey Nielsen:
Yes?

Elaine Duff:
I want to tell you a story.

Honey Nielsen:
I love stories.

Elaine Duff:
It's about 2 women who live next door to each other.

Honey Nielsen:
Like us?

Elaine Duff:
Right! You and me. And one of them had a son who spent all of his time at the other one's house.

Honey Nielsen:
Like us!

Elaine Duff:
Right! You and me! And that mother plied that boy with turkey and snicker doodles and all of his favorite things and made his mother look like Doodie.

Honey Nielsen:
Howdy doodie?

Elaine Duff:
No such luck!

Honey Nielsen:
Oh, pooh! Elaine, I never meant to intrude but you just always seem so busy.

Elaine Duff:
Yeah, I'm working.

Honey Nielsen:
Well, if that's all it is, why not just give up your job?

Elaine Duff:
Now, why didn't I think of doing that? Just one thing. Who's gonna pay the rent?

Honey Nielsen:
Oh! Well, I know. Maybe you can just cut out some of those pesky evening activities.

Elaine Duff:
I go to meetings and rallies to try to make this world a better place for my boys. Look, Honey, I do my best. I really do. And I wish I could spend more time with my kids but guess what. Lately, when I try to make time, they're not interested.

Honey Nielsen:
Oh, Elaine.

Elaine Duff:
Oh, I don't know. Maybe Skunk is a lost cause but Mike used to be my best pal ever since his father left us and it hurts me that he wants to spend his birthday with you and not me.

Honey Nielsen:
[starts to cry] Oh, Elaine. I'm so sorry.

Honey Nielsen:
Oh, geez, this isn't your fault.

Honey Nielsen:
[crying] Oh, yes it is! I never knew. But now I do. I really do. Oh, you must think I'm nothing but a... a home wrecker!

Elaine Duff:
No, you're not, Honey!

Honey Nielsen:
[crying] Don't look at me. I don't deserve it.

Elaine Duff:
Honey! Cookie? Oh boy, I'm gonna be late for work. I better get that. Are you gonna be OK?