How I Met Your Mother2005

Ted Mosby:
[Ted has a flashback about his old Wesleyan radio gig after Robin finds it in his resume] Doctor X here, shooting truth bullets at you from an undisclosed location, 'cause if they knew where I was, they'd shut me down

Marshall Eriksen:
[Listening with Lily at their dorm room] You're on the third floor of the Student Center next to the game room, you tool!

Ted Mosby:
Been reading a lot of letters about my segment on how racist this school's meal plan is.

Lily Aldrin:
How can there be any letters if no one knows where you are, douche?

Ted Mosby:
That's why I'm organizing a happening outside the Dining Hall. Monday, at midnight. Time has come that these puppet masters took this ignorance of justice off the menu.

Student:
[Cuts in during broadcast] Hey Ted, we need a fourth one for foosball. What are you doing here, anyway?

Ted Mosby:
Dude, get out of here, be there in a sec. [resumes Doctor X spiel] Remember, Dining Hall at midnight. Another Doctor X happening. I'll be there, 'cause X marks the spot-ot-ot-ot...

Marshall Eriksen:
[In present day] If you think people liked your show, they did not-ot-ot-ot...