Inside Story1974

[talking about passengers travelling without tickets]

Peter Kirton - Trains Inspector:
I once had one come from Scarborough, came out of the exit barrier at Leeds, and she said "I've no ticket, no money, I've come from Scarborough". She was a biggish lady

[he mimes a large pair of breasts]

Peter Kirton - Trains Inspector:
and she had this blouse that was sort of elasticated. "No ticket, no money, no way I can pay you." So I said "I'll have to take your particulars down". She says "I'll do it for you".

[laughs and mimes her pulling down her blouse]

Peter Kirton - Trains Inspector:
And the ticket collector was a Pakistani lad and he said "Oooo, Missis. You put your booboos away". I says "You leave her alone. She knows what she's doing."