Late Show with David Letterman1993

Alan Kalter:
Dwight, have you had any luck finding a summer job?

Dwight The Troubled Teen:
Summer job? When all my friends are playing video games and hanging out at the mall? No way.

Alan Kalter:
A summer job means spending money, Dwight. And it teaches you responsibility.

Dwight The Troubled Teen:
Oh, responsibility. Like when you brag to your golf buddies about how you cheat on your taxes? And when you hit that car in the parking lot and just drove away? You disgust me, you corrupt old fraud! I hate you! I hate all of you!

Dwight The Troubled Teen:
Hi, I'm Dwight the Troubled Teen. This summer, why not help make our nation's highways and byways beautiful. Join a highway clean-up program in your area. You'll be glad you did! This is Dwight the Troubled Teen saying, "Have a fun, safe summer, everyone."