New Tricks2003

[last lines]

Gerry Standing:
Well, I'm going for a pint. You going to the library?

Brian Lane:
I've had it with libraries.

Gerry Standing:
Eh?

Brian Lane:
They're full of weirdos.

Gerry Standing:
I thought that's why you felt so at home.

Jack Halford:
Anyway, they're a thing of the past.

Det. Supt. Sandra Pullman:
Mm, really?

Brian Lane:
[holding up ereader] This is the way forward. Linked to the Internet it allows me to access the world's literary culture from the comfort of my own armchair.

Gerry Standing:
Cor, let's have a go. Can you play football manager on it?

Brian Lane:
No, you can't, and be careful. I've just downloaded the complete poems of Philip Larkin.

Jack Halford:
Now there's a man who spent his life in libraries.

Gerry Standing:
Huh. Here's a good quote.

Det. Supt. Sandra Pullman:
What's that then?

Gerry Standing:
"Books are a load of crap."

Jack Halford:
[affected professorial tone] I think you'll find that's an example of Larkin's use of irony.