Stacked2005

[first lines]

Harold:
Morning, Kat.

Katrina:
Morning, Harold. I'll get your coffee in a minute; I'm a little swamped back here.

Harold:
No thank you, no coffee for me. Never again; I'm going cold turkey.

Katrina:
Since when?

Harold:
Since I read a new study on the ill effects of caffeine. It's a powerful and dangerous drug you're peddling.

Katrina:
Relax, it's just coffee.

Harold:
I can relax; I'm not a coffee drinker. Anxiety and sleeplessness are two side effects. Also decreased sperm mobility. That's right, you're up all night, and your boys can't dance. [a waiting customer leaves the line]

Katrina:
Harold, that's not true

Harold:
It's *fact*! And sterility isn't the worst of it. Coffee can cause respiratory problems, heart disease. You might as well be pouring a hot cup of cigarettes. [more customers leave]

Katrina:
Would you stop!

Harold:
That's what you'll be saying to the pain as your calcium-starved bones snap like pretzels.

Katrina:
[to the last customer] Here you go. [he declines the coffee and leaves] Well, wait, there's a... [Harold takes the coffee] Harold!

Harold:
I love coffee and I *hate* lines.