The Andy Griffith Show1960

Sheriff Andy Taylor:
[reading a note tied to a rock Ernest T. Bass threw through the window] "Maybe you goin' to have a weddin', and maybe you goin' to have a preacher; but you might not have a bride. You ever think of that?" Mr. Darling, you don't think he'd try to kidnap Charlene before the wedding?

Briscoe Darling:
He might. He's just crazy enough to do it.

Dud Wash:
Well, you just let him try! I'll show him some things I learned in the army in jungle warfare! First, you grab the mouth and pull like this.

[demonstrates by pulling his own mouth]

Dud Wash:
Then you grade his nose and twist it like this.

[twists his own nose]

Briscoe Darling:
Stop that, boy! You want your face to freeze thatta' way?