The Big Bang Theory2007

Sheldon Cooper:
I'm having some difficulty bonding with a colleague at work, so I'm doing a little research to better understand why my current friends like me.

Penny:
Yes, well, that is a good question. But is this really the best way to figure it out?

Sheldon Cooper:
I agree. The social sciences are largely hokum. But short of putting electrodes in your brain and monitoring your response to my companionship, this is the best I can do.

Penny:
Okay, question one: "Rank the following aspects of Sheldon Cooper in order of appeal: intelligence, ruthless attention to hygiene, playfulness, Java applet writing"?

Sheldon Cooper:
I know. I may have started off with a fairly obvious one. An aspect of of my most appealing trait: playfulness. Why don't you just go ahead and rank that number one? I'm afraid you're on your own for the rest. It should take you no more than three hours.

Penny:
Well, wait, how many questions are on this thing?

Sheldon Cooper:
Only two hundred and eleven. Don't worry. In deference to you, I've kept them all at a high school graduate reading level.

Penny:
[sarcastically] Thanks, pal.

Sheldon Cooper:
You got it, buddy.

Penny:
Sheldon, honey, did you ever consider making friends by being, I don't know, pleasant?

Sheldon Cooper:
Well, that's certainly a thought-provoking hypothesis. May I suggest it as the topic for your essay?