The Simpsons1989

Marge:
Homer, look! It's a TV Guide owned by Jackie O!

John:
You should see the crossword puzzle! She thought Mindy lived with "Mark."

Homer:
Give her a break! Her husband was killed!

John:
Oh, I know! Wasn't that awful? Hi, I'm John! Can I help you with anything?

Marge:
Yes, I have something that I'd like to sell.

John:
Please tell me it's your hair.

Marge:
No, it's an heirloom my grandmother passed down to me. A very rare, old figurine from the Civil War.

Lisa:
Please don't construe our ownership of this as an endorsement of slavery.

John:
Hmm, well see, here's the thing on this. It's a Johnny Reb bottle, early 1970s, one of the J & R Liquor lads. Two books of green stamps, if I'm not mistaken.

Marge:
Oh, no! Oh no! No, no, no, no! It's a very, very old figurine!

John:
No, it's a liquor bottle. See? [Unscrews the cap and pours himself a drink] Ah, that'll make your bull run!