Two and a Half Men

Two and a Half Men2003

Director: Chuck Lorre
Two and a Half Men is an American television sitcom that originally aired on CBS for twelve seasons from September 22, 2003, to February 19, 2015. Originally starring Charlie Sheen, Jon Cryer, and Angus T. Jones, the series was about a hedonistic ji… more »



Charlie Harper:
You're leaving, too, right?

Alan Harper:
Yes, relax. I plan on spending Christmas Eve at a movie theater all by myself, just so you can have sex tonight.

Charlie Harper:
You could have sex, too. Just pick the right movie theater. [the doorbell rings]

Charlie Harper:
Jake, time to go!

Charlie Harper:
[to Alan] Take some paper towels and don't wear your suede shoes.

Alan Harper:
[sarcastic] Ho, ho, ho!

Charlie Harper:
That's another option.

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    "Two and a Half Men Quotes." Quotes.net. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 23 Dec. 2024. <https://www.quotes.net/mquote/946024>.

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