Accepted2006

Bartleby Gaines:
Uh, Dean Lewis why don't you tell them a little bit about the philosophy here at south Harmon?

Uncle Ben:
Look, we throw a lot of fancy words in front of these kids in order to attract them to going to school in the belief that they're gonna have a better life, and we know that all were doing is breeding a whole new generation of buyers and sellers, BUYERS AND SELLERS! Pimps and whores, PIMPS AND WHORES! and indoctrinating them into a life long hell of debt and indecision!

Jack Gaines:
I... I, I just don't understand...

Uncle Ben:
DO I HAVE TO SPOON FEED IT TO YA? look, there's only one reason that kids want to go to school...

Bartleby Gaines:
[quietly] Holy sh*t...

Jack Gaines:
[after long pause]... Which is?

Uncle Ben:
...To get a good job... To get a good job, with a great starting salary.

Jack Gaines:
I couldn't agree more.

Diane Gaines:
It is so refreshing to have somebody approach education so rationally!

Uncle Ben:
F***in' A!