Bill Engvall: Here's Your Sign Live2004

[about the "missing" gene that tells men when to shut up]

Bill Engvall:
I was in line at the grocery store a couple of months ago. There was a woman in front of me who had, without a doubt, ladies and gentlemen, the ugliest baby I have ever seen in my life.

[laughter]

Bill Engvall:
Don't get me wrong, I love children. This was a Halloween mask with legs, all right?

[laughter]

Bill Engvall:
You could not *drink* this baby cute, all right? And I was just mesmerized by this child's ugliess! And the woman looked at me and I panicked, and I went "Wow! Hmm, that's a handsome little man there." And the lady said "*she* is a *little girl*!"

[laughter]

Bill Engvall:
Every synapse in my brain is screaming "shut up, man! Just look stupid, like a guy, just look stupid." And my mouth goes "think of the money you'll save on prom dresses!"

[laughter]