Despicable Me: Minion Mayhem 3D2012

[first lines of the first pre-show]

Gru:
[stands face-to-face with the camera, maintaining it] Testing... Testing... Ah-oo-wee-a-hoo-ha!

[clears his throat and backpedals from the camera]

Gru:
Greetings, recruits. Welcome to my home. I am Gru, master villain, scourge of humanity. So... you want to be a Minion? Your training will begin soon, but be warned: danger lurks

[evilly]

Gru:
at every turn.

[suddenly backs away]

Agnes:
[chasing Kyle] Kyle! Come here, Kyle!

Gru:
Agnes, please! Please! Uhh... Daddy's trying to be evil!

[Meanwhile, Edith and Margo also enter the room. The former makes a funny face in front of the camera while the latter approaches Gru]

Margo:
[scoffs] What are you doing?

Gru:
[irate] I am trying to...

[suddenly turns to Agnes, who's holding Kyle]

Agnes:
[sing-song; to the audience] Who's the cutest puppy in the world?

[kisses Kyle on the camera, leaving a smudge, then continues chasing him]