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Martland: The fact that you're as drunk as a fiddler's bitch in no way obviates the fact that you very nearly caused an international incident. A man your age has no excuse for looking or behaving like a fugitive from a home for alcoholic music hall artistes.Mortdecai: I will have you know that I am not an alcoholic. I am a drunk, and there is a vast difference.

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    Barbra Streisand's first line in her first movie was...?
    A "Hello, Dolly!"
    B "Hi, I am here!"
    C "Papa, can you hear me?"
    D "Hello gorgeous!"