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Jane Deborah Hilton: I beg your pardon, Colonel Smollett. There's someone here to see you. Your grandson.Colonel William G. Smollett: William?Corporal William G. 'Bill' Smollett II: Hello, Grandpa!Colonel William G. Smollett: To what peculiar combination of circumstances do I owe this visit, William?Corporal William G. 'Bill' Smollett II: Well, you see, I was transferred out here to Chamberlain Field, and I found out at your office -Colonel William G. Smollett: Indeed? I wasn't even aware that the United States forces had been honored by your membership.Corporal William G. 'Bill' Smollett II: I enlisted, sir. Last summer.Colonel William G. Smollett: So. I don't think we need trouble these young women with your autobiography. Let's go into the living room. If you will excuse me.Corporal William G. 'Bill' Smollett II: Excuse me.Colonel William G. Smollett: I presume you've come to me for help of one sort or another with your tail between your legs.Corporal William G. 'Bill' Smollett II: No, sir, I thought you might like - Well, you see -Colonel William G. Smollett: Or is it money that you're after? Speak up, boy.Corporal William G. 'Bill' Smollett II: I thought you might like to see me.Colonel William G. Smollett: A very mistaken notion if ever you had one, and you've had plenty as we're both well aware.Corporal William G. 'Bill' Smollett II: After all, I thought we may not see one another again. I don't know when I'll be shipped out.Colonel William G. Smollett: Come, William. Let's not dramatize these things. There's no need for any pretense of affection between us. You've paid your courtesy call.Corporal William G. 'Bill' Smollett II: Well, all right, if that's the way you feel about it! I'm sorry to have disturbed you.Colonel William G. Smollett: You may drop me a line with your address. And if you have any affairs that require attention, I shall have my lawyers look after them. For your late father's sake. Now, I'm sure you will excuse me. I'm a bit tired.

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    Quiz

    Are you a quotes master?

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    "Toto, I've got a feeling we're not in Kansas anymore."
    A Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory
    B The Princess Bride
    C It's a Wonderful Life
    D The Wizard of Oz