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Holmes: [after he learns Madame Petrova wants him to impregnate her] This is all very flattering, but surely there are other men, better men.Nikolai Rogozhin: To tell truth, you were not the first choice. We considered Russian writer, Tolstoy.Holmes: Oh, that's more like it. The man's a genius.Nikolai Rogozhin: Too old. Then we considered philosopher, Nietzsche.Holmes: Well, absolutely first-rate mind.Nikolai Rogozhin: Uh-uh. Too German. Then we considered Tchaikovsky.Holmes: Oh, you couldn't go wrong with Tchaikovsky.Nikolai Rogozhin: We could, and we did. It was catastrophe.Holmes: Why?Nikolai Rogozhin: You don't know? Because Tchaikovsky, how shall I put it? Women not his glass of tea.

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