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Nigel: All right, my son: I could've had it away with this cracking Julie, my old China. (Subtitle: I was about to make love to this pretty girl.) Austin: Are you telling pork-pies and a bag of trout? Because if you are feeling quigly, why not just have a J. Arthur? (Is this true? If you were aroused, why didn't you pleasure yourself?) Nigel: What, billy no mates? (What, alone?) Austin: Too right, youth. (Indeed.) Nigel: Don't you remember the crimbo din-din we had with the grotty Scots bint? (Remember Christmas dinner with the Scottish girl?) Austin: Oh, the one that was all sixes and sevens! (The insane one?) Nigel: Yeah, yeah, she was the trouble and strife of the Morris dancer what lived up the apples and pears! (She was the wife of the dancer who lived upstairs.) Austin: She was the barrister what become a bobby in a lorry and... (A lawyer who became a policeman in a truck) [inaudiably] (????????)... Austin & Nigel: --tea kettle! Nigel: And then, and then-- Austin & Nigel: She shat on a turtle!

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