Gertie: What are you going as for Halloween?
Elliot: I'm not going to stupid Halloween.
Micheal: Why don't you go as a goblin?
Elliot: Shut up.
Mary: It's not that we don't believe you, honey.
Elliot: Well, it was real, I swear!
Mary: [changing the subject] What are you going as, Gert?
Gertie: [with steak in mouth] I'm going as a cowgirl.
Elliot: So, what else is new?
Micheal: Maybe it was an iguana.
Elliot: It was no iguana.
Micheal: Maybe, uh... uh-- You know how they say there are, uh, alligators in the sewers?
Gertie: Alligators in the sewers.
Mary: All we're trying to say is maybe you just probably imagined it. It happens.
Elliot: I couldn't have imagined it!
Micheal: Maybe it was a pervert, or a deformed kid, or something.
Gertie: A deformed kid.
Micheal: Maybe, uh, an elf or a leprechaun.
Elliot: [stands up angrily] IT WAS NOTHING LIKE THAT, PENIS-BREATH!
Mary: [laughs in shock] Elliot! [regains composure] Sit down. [clears throat]
Elliot: [sitting down] Dad would believe me.
Mary: Maybe you oughtta call your father and tell him about it.
Elliot: I can't. He's in Mexico with Sally.
Gertie: Wh-Where's Mexico?
Mary: Excuse me. [leaves the table and walks to the window]
Micheal: [softly to Elliot] I'm gonna kill you.
Mary: If you ever see it again, whatever it is, don't touch it, just call me, and we'll have somebody come and take it away.
Gertie: Like the dogcatcher?
Elliot: But they'll give it to a lobotomy, or do experiments on it, or somethin'.
Mary: It's your turn to do the dishes, fellas.
Micheal: I set and cleared.
Elliot: I set and cleared.
Micheal: [quickly] I did breakfast.
Gertie: I did breakfast.
[Mary slams a pot down on the sideboard, offscreen]
Micheal: What's the matter, Mom?
Mary: [emotionally; about the kids' father] He hates Mexico.
Micheal: [to Elliot] Damn it, why don't you...grow up? Think how other people feel for a change?
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