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Wallace: [to Scott] Hey! What's up with his outfit? Guy: Yeah. Is he a pirate? [audience titters] Scott: [to Matthew] Are you a pirate? Matthew: [defensive] Pirates are in this year. [Scott and Matthew fight some more, and Scott seizes him by the arms.] Scott: [to Ramona] You really went out with this guy? [spotlight shines on Ramona] Ramona: Yeah. In the 7th grade. Scott: And? Ramona: [sighs] It was football season, and for some reason, all the little jocks wanted me. Matthew was the only non-white, non-jock boy in town. So the two of us joined forces, and we took 'em all down. We brawled, and scrapped, and fought for hours. Nothing could beat Matthew's mystical powers. We only kissed once. After a week and a half, I told him to hit the showers. Scott: Dude, wait. Mystical powers? Matthew: [pushes Scott back; to Ramona] You'll pay for this...Flowers. [singing] ? If you want to fight me ? Stacy: [confused and flatly] What? Matthew: Ha! ? You're not the brightest. You won't know what hit you in the slightest. ? [vocalizes and makes Demon Hipster Chicks appear.] Stephen: [stunned] This guy's good. Matthew: ? Me and my fireballs. ? [hisses] ? My Demon Hipster Chicks. ? Demon Hipster Chicks: Tell 'em, Matty. Matthew: ? I'm talking the talk, 'cause I know I'm slick. ? [winks] Demon Hipster Chicks: S-L-ick. Matthew: ? Fireballs, take this sucker down. Let us show him what we're all about. ? Scott: [angrily] That doesn't even rhyme! [throws a cymbal which hits Matthew on his head, and makes the Demon Hipster Chicks disappear] Matthew: [thinking] This is impossible. How can this be? Scott: [also thinking] Open your eyes. Maybe you'll see. [flies toward Matthew video-game-style and punches his face] Announcer: K.O.! [Matthew turns into coins, thus earning Scott 1,000 points.] Scott: [happily] Sweet! Coins. [he picks up the coins] Man: God, did that just happen? Another Man: That just happened. Ramona: Well...it was nice meeting you. Tell your...gay friends I said bye. Stacy: [confused] "Gay friends"? [shocked and angry] Wallace! Again?! [Wallace and Jimmy kiss, and a heart is written over them] Woman: Get a room, guys! Man: Oh, my God! Scott: Oh, man, $2.40? That's not even enough for the bus home. Ramona: I'll lend you the 35¢. Sound Guy: Yeah, so, Sex Bob-Omb wins. Knives: [recovering] Sex Bob-Omb won? [starts whooping, but stops and doesn't see Scott; saddened] Oh. [later on the bus] Scott: So...what was all that all about? Ramona: Um...I guess... if we're gonna date, you may have to defeat my seven evil exes. Scott: You have seven evil ex-boyfriends? Ramona: Seven evil exes, yes. Scott: And I have to fight-- Ramona: Defeat. Scott: Defeat your seven evil exes if we're going to continue to date? Ramona: Pretty much. Scott: So, what you're saying right now is we are dating? Ramona: Uh, I guess. Scott: Does that mean we can make out? Ramona: [smiles] Sure. Scott: Cool. Studio Audience: Aw!

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