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Mr. Brown: Let me tell you what Like a Virgin is about. It's all about a girl who digs a guy with a big dick. The entire song. It's a metaphor for big dicks. Mr. Blonde: No, no. It's about a girl who is very vulnerable. She's been fucked over a few times. Then she meets some guy who's really sensitive... Mr. Brown: Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa... Time out, Greenbay. Tell that fuckin' bullshit to the tourists. Joe Cabot: [looking at his address book] Toby... Who the fuck is Toby? Mr. Brown: Like a Virgin is not about some sensitive girl who meets a nice fella. That's what True Blue is about. Granted, no argument about that. Mr. Orange: Which one is True Blue? Nice Guy Eddie: You ain't heard True Blue? It was a big ass hit for Madonna. I don't even follow this Tops of the Pops shit, and even I've heard of True Blue. Mr. Orange: Look, asshole, I didn't say I ain't heard of it. All I asked was how does it go? Excuse me for not being the world's biggest Madonna fan. Mr. Blonde: Personally, I can do without her. Mr. Blue: I used to like her early stuff. Borderline - but once she got off with that Papa Don't Preach phase, I tuned out. Mr. Brown: You guys are, like, making me lose my... train of thought here. I was saying something, what was it? Joe Cabot: Oh, Toby's that little Chinese girl. What was her last name? Mr. White: What's that? Joe Cabot: It's an old address book I found in a coat I haven't worn in a coon's age. What was that name? Mr. Brown: What the fuck was I talking about? Mr. Pink: You said 'True Blue' was about a guy... er.... a sensitive girl who meets a nice guy, but 'Like a Virgin' was a metaphor for big dicks. Mr. Brown: O.K., let me tell you what Like a Virgin's about. It's all about this cooze who's a regular fuck machine, I'm talking morning, day, night, afternoon: dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick. Mr. Blue: How many dicks is that? Mr. White: A lot. Mr. Brown: Then one day she meets this John Holmes motherfucker and it's like, whoa baby, I mean this cat is like Charles Bronson in The Great Escape; he's digging tunnels. Now, she's gettin' the serious dick action and she's feeling something she ain't felt since forever. Pain. Pain. Joe Cabot: Chu? Toby Chu? Mr. Brown: It hurts. It hurts her. It shouldn't hurt her, you know her pussy should be Bubble Yum by now, but when this cat fucks her it hurts. It hurts, just like it did the first time. You see the pain is reminding the fuck machine what it once was like to be a virgin. Hence, "Like a Virgin."

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