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Richie: Do you know I went to Yoga? I did! If I'd got up to level twenty I might have been able to f*** myself. As look would have it, I got to level thirteen, accidently sneezed and blew myself inside out. What I thought was a rather funky goatee beard turned out to be my pubic hair. I couldn't see it anyway though because I had two bollocks hanging in front of my eyes. I was in surgery three days, three whole days before the surgeons stopped giggling.

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    Quiz

    Are you a quotes master?

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    "Nothing in this world is worth having or worth doing, unless it means effort, pain, difficulty."
    A Marilyn Monroe
    B Theodore Roosevelt
    C David Beckham
    D Winston Churchill