Replacement T. V. Anchor: Good evening. We've just received warning from the office of the Handicapper General that suspected-anarchist Harrison Bergeron has escaped from custody. Arrested six years ago for propagandist vandalism, broadcast piracy, refusal to report for his quarterly handicapping evaluations, and for the blatant removal of his handicaps in a public place, Mr. Bergeron had been awaiting trial in a maximum security prison here in Washington, D. C., when he, miraculously, disappeared from his cell earlier this evening. Please be advised that Bergeron is a genius and an athlete, is underhandicapped, and is considered extremely dangerous.
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