[During an awkward backstage face-off between Scott and Ramona and Envy and Todd, their respective exes]Knives Chau: [gasps, standing up][Everyone looks at Knives]Knives Chau: [to Envy] I've kissed lips that kissed you![Envy looks at Todd and nods, Todd stands up and punches Knives in the face, knocking the blue dye out of her hair and sending her reeling to the floor]Scott Pilgrim: [stands up, horrified] Knives!Todd Ingram: [nonchalant] What? I'm not afraid to hit a girl. I'm a rock star.Young Neil: [glares at Todd] Oh, my God. You punched the highlights out of her hair. [to Scott] He punched the highlights out of her hair!Envy Adams: You are incorrigible.Todd Ingram: I don't know the meaning of the word.Caption: HE REALLY DOESN'T.[Young Neil leads a shellshocked Knives away]Julie Powers: [changing the subject] So, uh, you guys doing anything fun while you're in town?Todd Ingram: "Fun"? In Toronto?Envy Adams: Ha!Scott Pilgrim: [slamming fists on table.] That's IT! [Envy gasps in horror] YOU COCKY COCK! You'll pay for your crimes against humanity![Scott lunges to attack Todd, but is frozen by psychic energy. Todd, eyes glowing and hair standing on end, levitates Scott into the air]Scott Pilgrim: [choking] My neck. [gasps] Your hair.Envy Adams: Didn't you know? Todd's vegan.[Todd flings Scott through a brick wall into an alleyway outside.]Scott Pilgrim: [standing up] Vegan?Todd Ingram: [moves couch out of the way psychically] It's not really that big of a deal. [kicks and breaks off part of the brick wall]Scott Pilgrim: No kidding. [coughs] Anyone can be vegan.Todd Ingram: Ovo-lacto-vegetarian, maybe.Scott Pilgrim: Ovo-what?Todd Ingram: I partake not in the meat, nor the breastmilk, nor the ovum, of any creature with a face.Envy Adams: Short answer: being vegan just makes you better than most people.Todd Ingram: Bingo.[Todd punches Scott and sends him, screaming, leaving a trail of A's high into the air and out of sight.]Stephen Stills: Hey, man, question. I always wondered, how does not eating dairy products give you psychic powers?Todd Ingram: [rolls eyes] Okay, you know how you only use 10% of your brain? That's because the other 90% is filled with curds and whey.Kim Pine: [dismissive] Did you learn that at Vegan Academy?Todd Ingram: Go ahead and get snippy, baby. If you knew the science, maybe I'd listen to a word you're saying.[Scott falls back to solid ground after hitting a light fixture. Ramona runs over to him]Scott Pilgrim: [weakly] If I peed my pants, would you pretend I just got wet from the rain?Ramona Flowers: It's not raining.Scott Pilgrim: Oh. Then, why don't you give me the CliffsNotes on how why you ended up dating this A-hole?Ramona Flowers: Is it really necessary?Scott Pilgrim: Well, if there's a key element in his backstory that's gonna help me out in a critical moment of not dying, yes.Ramona Flowers: I was only dating Lucas until the minute Todd walked by. Guess that's not very nice, but I used to be kind of...like that. We hated everyone. We wrecked stuff, nobody cared. He punched a hole in the moon for me. It was pretty crazy. A week-and-a-half later, he told me his dad was sending him to Vegan Academy, so, I dumped him.Scott Pilgrim: Have you dumped everyone you've ever been with? You've never been the dumpee?Ramona Flowers: Look, I've dabbled in being a bitch. It's part of the reason I moved here. I was hoping to just...leave it all behind me.Todd Ingram: Hey, lovebirds. We have unfinished business, I and he.Scott Pilgrim: He and me.Todd Ingram: Don't you talk to me about grammar.Scott Pilgrim: I dislike you, capisce?Todd Ingram: Tell it to the cleaning lady on Monday.Scott Pilgrim: What?Todd Ingram: Because you'll be dust by Monday...Scott Pilgrim: [confused] Ummm...Todd Ingram: Because you'll be pulverized in two seconds. And the cleaning lady? She cleans up... dust. She dusts.Scott Pilgrim: S-so, what's on Monday?Envy Adams: [Rolls eyes]Todd Ingram: [also confused] Well, 'cause... it's Friday now, she has the weekends off, so... Monday. Right?

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