Narrator: Everyone is born, but not everyone is born the same. Some will grow to be butchers, or bakers, or candlestick makers. Some will only be really good at making Jell-O salad. One way or another, though, every human being is unique, for better or for worse.
Narrator: Most parents believe their children are the most beautiful creatures ever to grace the planet. Others take a less emotional approach:
Harry Wormwood: What a waste of time!
Zinnia Wormwood: And painful!
Harry Wormwood: And expensive... $9.25 for a bar of soap?
Zinnia Wormwood: Well, I had to take a shower, Harry!
Harry Wormwood: $5,000? I'm not paying it! What are they going to do, repossess the kid?
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