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Ted: Here's why I should get the place. You and Lily, you get to be married. What do I get, right? I get to be unmarried, alone, minus two roommates. And on top of that I could be homeless. Does that seem fair?Marshall: Oh, boo-freakin-hoo.Ted: What?Marshall: Woe is me. I'm not married yet; my ovaries are shrinking.

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