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Barney Stinson: [after sleeping together] In my experience the way this normally goes is we lie here for a while; make a little awkward chit-chat.Robin Scherbatsky: Check.Barney Stinson: Then I make up some cabinet meeting, heart surgery, rocket test flight I got to be at, slip out of your apartment and never call you again.Robin Scherbatsky: And later at the bar you tell your good friend Robin the story of your latest conquest and she wonders to herself "Who is this sad, self-loathing idiot who climbed in to bed with Barney Stinson?"Barney Stinson: Actually, you usually say that out loud.

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