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Capt. Benjamin Franklin "Hawkeye" Pierce: [Upon seeing the dozens of tongue depressor boxes] Oh, the new neighbors must be moving into that vacant tent down the block.Capt. B.J. Hunnicut: Gee, I hope they have some kids my age.Colonel Sherman T. Potter: There is no humor in this, gents. That dumb trucker just stuck us with five hundred thousand tongue depressors.Capt. B.J. Hunnicut: [laughing] No wonder you look so down in the mouth.Capt. Benjamin Franklin "Hawkeye" Pierce: Five hundred thousand?Colonel Sherman T. Potter: I'm getting' too old for this. I should've taken the severance pay in twenty-eight, started that dude ranch. Damn zoning laws.

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