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Dan: [about wives] Well, they lie to us too. Last year Roseanne smashed up the front of my truck, and swore it happened while it was parked at the mall.Ray: Oh, that's an old one.Arnie Thomas: Man, did you call her on it, Dan.Dan: What, and waste all that guilt? To this day, when I mention how good my truck used to look, I get chocolate cake for dessert. If I squeeze out a couple of tears...Dan: [finger snap, snap] Cool Whip.

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