The Newsman: Here is a Muppet News Flash. Dateline: New York. Medical science has been baffled by a sudden epidemic of the rare disease, mallarditis. The illness strikes very quickly and causes its victim to turn into a duck. [looks up] Mallarditis? That's the silliest thing I ever... [suddenly, his head turns into that of a duck] Quack. Quack. Quack.
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