[Sir Humphrey demonstrates how public surveys can reach opposite conclusions]Sir Humphrey Appleby: Mr. Woolley, are you worried about the rise in crime among teenagers?Bernard Woolley: Yes.Sir Humphrey Appleby: Do you think there is lack of discipline and vigorous training in our Comprehensive Schools?Bernard Woolley: Yes.Sir Humphrey Appleby: Do you think young people welcome some structure and leadership in their lives?Bernard Woolley: Yes.Sir Humphrey Appleby: Do they respond to a challenge?Bernard Woolley: Yes.Sir Humphrey Appleby: Might you be in favour of reintroducing National Service?Bernard Woolley: Er, I might be.Sir Humphrey Appleby: Yes or no?Bernard Woolley: Yes.Sir Humphrey Appleby: Of course, after all you've said you can't say no to that. On the other hand, the surveys can reach opposite conclusions. [survey two] Mr. Woolley, are you worried about the danger of war?Bernard Woolley: Yes.Sir Humphrey Appleby: Are you unhappy about the growth of armaments?Bernard Woolley: Yes.Sir Humphrey Appleby: Do you think there's a danger in giving young people guns and teaching them how to kill?Bernard Woolley: Yes.Sir Humphrey Appleby: Do you think it's wrong to force people to take arms against their will?Bernard Woolley: Yes.Sir Humphrey Appleby: Would you oppose the reintroduction of conscription?Bernard Woolley: Yes.[does a double-take]Sir Humphrey Appleby: There you are, Bernard. The perfectly balanced sample.
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