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Matt Johnson: You know, Mrs. Barlow, there's something I'd like straighten out. Mrs. Barlow: What's that, Matt? Matt Johnson: Well, I did a lot of things around here I'm kind of ashamed of. I tore up your lawn with my '40 Ford... Mrs. Barlow: Many times. Matt Johnson: Took my pants off in front of your friends... Mrs. Barlow: Oh, yes. Matt Johnson: And I even passed out in your closet, but I never, and I don't know who could have if I didn't, but I never, and I repeat never, ever pissed in your steam iron.

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