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Vince: Man, someone must be in big trouble. Finster hasn't canceled recess since Billy Stoler short-sheeted her support hose. T.J.: She was limping for three days. Randall: [as Miss Finster appears; through megaphone] Ten-hut! [The kids all line-up] Miss Finster: This week, we've since a crime wave unparalleled in Third Street history. Someone on this playground is responsible for breaching nearly every rule he hold sacred. Mikey: Even the cannibalism taboo? Miss Finster: Evidence connects a single mastermind with these crimes. One kid who's done it all. Written graffiti, mocking the faculty, de-faced restrooms, stolen food from the cafeteria, and made a complete mess of the mess area! This someone will be going directly to Principal Prickly's office. This someone will receive severe punishment befitting these atrocities. This someone… is Gretchen P. Grundler! [The kids all gasp in shock at Gretchen] T.J.: Miss Finster, Gretchen's the best kid in school! Vince: Yeah, you're making a terrible mistake! Spinelli: Tell her, Gretchen! Gretchen: No, guys, she's right. Take me away, Miss Finster. T.J.: Gretchen, what are you saying? Gretchen: Don't worry yourself over me anymore, T.J. I'm nothing but trouble. [The episode's title appears] Miss Finster: March, young lady! T.J.: Gretchen gone bad? It can't be! Mikey: Down is up, black is white and the Millennium approaches! [Miss Finster escorts Gretchen into the school and to Principal Prickly's office] Gretchen: [narrating] I know what you're asking. How did it happen? How did Gretchen Grundler, straight-A student end up taking the long walk to the principal's office? It's a story as long as a line had gone so old, but without the free refills. Ms. Lemon: [typing her typewriter] We've been expecting you, Grundler. Take a seat, Principal Prickly will be with you in a moment. [Gretchen takes a seat next to Sue Bob Murphy] Sue Bob: Well, well, if it ain't Goody-Two-Shoes Grundler. What'd you do, Grundler, get too many A's? Gretchen: I'm not in the mood, Murphy.

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