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Church: (wearing his white "ghost" armor, next to Caboose) Hi, everybody. I'm Private Church from the popular web series, Red vs. Blu- (Donut enters) Hey, Donut! What are you doing, man? You're supposed to be wearing your old red armor so that we can be red, white, and blue. This isn't very patriotic. Donut: I'm being patriotic...in my own way! Church: Alright, let's just start alrea- Caboose: Hello, everyone. I am Private Church from the popular web series, Red vs.- Church: Caboose, that's my line. Caboose: You can't prove that! Church: As you probably know already, this weekend we celebrate July 4th, or as it's known in Mexico, Cinco de Mayo. Caboose: Many of you may take this oppurtunity to enjoy your weiner. Donut: I know I will! Church: But the real reason we celebrate the 4th of July isn't for the food, or the fun, or even the picnics with the nonstop binge drinking. Donut: What? Church: There's only one true reason we celebrate the 4th of July: to have a lot of explosions. Caboose: Yay! It's fireworks day! Donut: Kick-ass! I've still got 3 fingers left from last year!

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