Gohan: Dad, could you kick an angel's ass? Goku: You're damn right I could. [A loud thumping is heard on the roof as Goku and Gohan look around] Gohan: Is that Santa on the roof? Goku: Well if not, I got a present for him. [racks handgun slide] [Santa falls hard out of the chimney] Gohan: Santa, Santa! Santa: Oh! My mother[bleep]ing knee, Oh, [bleep]! [Bleep]! Dog [bleep]! [Bleep] it all to Hell that hurts like a mother[bleep]! Gohan: Dad, what's a [bleep]? Goku: Uh...er...heh. So, uh Santa, what happened? Santa: Bandits, Goku; they stole my reindeer, and all the presents...and my pants! [Goku covers Gohan's eyes. Cut to Composite Santa Claus, the Nutcracker, and the Little Drummer Boy at the North Pole] The Nutcracker: Ha ha ha, Christmas is ours! Reindeer 1: You'll never get away with this! Composite Santa: Ho, ho, ho! [makes a fist] I've got five good reasons for you to shut up: [pulls out a gun and shoots the reindeer five times] One, two, three-four-five! [Goku and Gohan appeared behind the tree] Gohan: Dad, who are those guys? Goku: Kung fu legends. That's the Little Drummer Boy, whose mystical drum conjures summon demons most foul. The Nutcracker, who knows over 100 different testicle-based attacks. And Composite Santa Claus, who looks like one half Santa and one half Frosty the Snowman. Gohan: What are Composite Santa's powers? Goku: I don't know, but he freaks me right the [bleep] out. Composite Santa: [spots Goku and Gohan near the tree] Intruders!!! Little Drummer Boy: I will conquer the demon with my magical drum! Hahahaha!! [conjures the demons while playing the drums, and drops the sticks] Goku: Spirit BOOOOOOOOMMMMBB!!! Gohan:: YELLING REALLY LOUD!! [Goku and Gohan then blasts little Drummer Boy away using their Father-Son Kamehameha technique. In the process, their blasts accidently kills two reindeers] Reindeers: Holy [bleep]!!!! [The Nutcracker is shocked] Gohan: [riding the Nimbus Cloud] I'll get this one dad. [the Nutcracker shakes his fist, but is then knocked over and covered by the Nimbus Cloud with Gohan on top of it] You're not so tough! Nutcracker: Testicle Attack #49! [punches Gohan in the groin through the Nimbus Cloud] Gohan: OW! My Dragon Balls! [Goku is now seen in the area and is powering up while shouting loudly. Composite Santa does the same, but is standing on the ground. Goku then charges at Composite Santa while they are both shouting simultaneously until Composite Santa states] Composite Santa: Okay, I got nothing. [Goku is then seen charging and firing a Kamehameha Wave at the Nutcracker destroying him. As Compote Santa turns to see, his Snowman side melts in an instant] Ah! Temperatures over 32 degrees Fahrenheit...my only weakness! [dies] Goku: [exhausted and panting, is joined by Gohan, who is still holding his groin] We...did it. Mrs. Santa: [off-screen] Fools! [Mrs. Santa is seen flying on the scene and lands besides Goku and Gohan] Goku and Gohan: Mrs. Santa?! Mrs. Santa: That's right. The mastermind behind this evil attack on Christmas is me! Goku: But why? Mrs. Santa: It all started at the North Pole. [seen at Santa's Workshop in a flashback, holding her head in pain and is joined by two elves] I started getting Terrible Headaches. Elf: Mrs. Claus? Are you okay? [Using some form of telepahty, Mrs. Santa knocks both Elf into the walls beside her, killing them in a brutal display. Back to the present] Mrs. Santa: At first I taught it really was my period, but that was not the case as I hit menopause centuries ago. [the Drummer boy comes and does a rim shot, dropping the sticks and leaves the scene] Polar radiation forced an evolutionary change in me. Now I want revenge. [suddenly mutated into a huge blob] Santa: Darling! Nooooooooooooo!!!! Tetsuo: [appears out of nowhere] Noooooooooo!!!! [Santa just realized that he's there as he continues shouting and then stops] Goku: [to the reindeers] Gohan and I need a minute to rest. It's up to you for now. Gohan: I-I think one of them popped. Reindeer 2: It's payback time! Let's beat her up so bad, her kids will inherit the bruises! Reindeer 3: Yeah, we'll hit her so hard, she'll starve to death rolling! Reindeer 2: She's so ugly, we'll push her face in dough and make gorilla biscuits! Reindeer 3: She so black, when she go to night school, teacher mark her absent! Santa: Tha-That-That's still my wife, guys. Both Reindeer: Kiillll!! {The reindeer attack her; but are quickly killed from her attack. Just then Rudolph shoots a red laser beam using his nose] Reindeer 4: Whoa, your nose shoots lasers?! Rudolph: You don't think there was a reason it glows red? What does yours shoot? [Reindeer 4 blows boogers from his snout] Eww! To think I wanted to play your games! [So after Goku and Gohan recover, they both fire a Kamehameha Wave at the mutated Mrs. Claus while Rudolph shoots her with a laser beam. As they continue, the mutated Mrs. Claus shows signs of instability of herself] Santa: She's grown too gigantic and unstable! [to the audience] Women, am I right, fellas? [Goku, Gohan, and Rudolph continue firing until Mrs. Claus turns into a beam shooting up in the air and explodes, leaving only a snowflake falling down towards Gohan's hand] Goku: The Tenka'ichi Budôkai is finally complete. Santa: What the [bleep] are you talking about?! Was that even English?! What happened to my wife?! [a reindeer licks the snowflake; sighs] This is the last time I bring presents to Japan. [The Little Drummer Boy appears, does a rim shot, and drops his sticks. Everyone looks at him as he leaves the scene]

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