Deadwood, Season One

Deadwood is a HBO television drama that originally aired from March 2004 to August 2006, set in the 1870s in Deadwood, Dakota Territory. It features many historical figures, such as Wild Bill Hickok, Seth Bullock, Sol Star, Calamity Jane, and Al Swe… more »

Al Swearengen:
Hey Doc, how long were you planning on taking before you told me what the f*** was wrong with Jewel?

Doc Cochran:
Nothing, nothing she wasn't born with.

Al Swearengen:
Mmm, I mean, she told me she was knocked up but I assumed that was her gimp sense of humor.

Doc Cochran:
She wants me to brace her leg so her dragging it doesn't drive you crazy.

Al Swearengen:
So what'd you tell her?

Doc Cochran:
Not to worry about your moods, that you generate those yourself and then you find your excuse for having 'em.

Al Swearengen:
Saucy words Doc, good thing you're handy with the snatch.

Doc Cochran:
I had an idea for a boot, just now measured her for it.

Al Swearengen:
If you treat her as successfully as you did the minister, she'll be kicking up her heels in no f***ing time.

Doc Cochran:
I will leave you now to pursue another excuse.

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