Friends, Season 9

Phoebe:
[singing] Ipan stripan glupi glapi! And that's the Swedish National Anthem, thank you for asking!

Rachel:
Wow, what a rich culture! You know, I have a friend who's a masseuse!

Phoebe:
Oh, ya!

Rachel:
She's not very good, though!

Phoebe:
And why do you think that is?

Rachel:
I don't know! Maybe because she's got callousy fingers from playing a crummy guitar!

Phoebe:
Or maybe she has trouble loosening your knots because you're such a high-maintenance tight-ass!

Rachel:
[turns up] PHOEBE!!

Phoebe:
You know it's me?

Rachel:
For a half-hour! Man, you can lie about Sweden!

Phoebe:
How can you come here?

Rachel:
How can you not tell me you work here?

Phoebe:
I don't have to tell you everything!

Rachel:
Yes you do, if you're going to make me feel guilty for getting a free massage!

Phoebe:
Tips not included.

Rachel:
Why did you lie to me about working here?

Phoebe:
I was ashamed! I sold out for the cash! They give me benefits like medical and dental and a 401! But you pay a price! Now I'm this corporate stooge, punching a clock, and paying taxes!

Rachel:
If you hate it, you should walk out there and quit! Be true to what you believe in! You have principles and I so admire that! I don't have any!

Phoebe:
You're right, I am going to quit! It's time I took my life back!

Rachel:
Good for you, Pheebs!

[Phoebe leaves the room, then looks up at the ceiling and whispers]

Phoebe:
If you guys had microphones in there, I didn't mean that! I love you!